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The Sinking Ship of Depression

If you are triggered by talk of depression please don't read any further. Take care of yourself. This post is a personal reflection of how someone without depression sees this illness and expresses personal opinions of such.

I never really understood what depression was or what it looked like. Though to my surprise I had seen it before in my mother, it is still a mystery to me.  Sure I have had deep feelings of sadness over a loss of a loved one, a beloved pet, a friendship that unraveled, or a personal failure of some type. But I always shed my tears, took a nap, gorged on carbs and sugar and moved forward. But when someone close to you experiences depression you realize it is more than a deep sadness. It's this gnawing monster that lives inside of a person and they have to battle this beast daily. Some days are better than others, but I know when the monster is strong, those days are the worst.

And this is looking on from the outside. I see the struggle to be strong. I see the falling tears. The look of hopelessness. I hear the sobs of anguish. I hear the negative things you say about yourself, to yourself. I hear the words that express how hard and tiring this battle is. And what can I do to help? I only have hugs, words of encouragement, and the ability to stand beside you, sometimes propping you up with words of hope to keep trudging on. Trying to keep you moving forward, especially on those difficult days. To me depression is like cancer. It can strike anyone at anytime in their life. And some will be survivors, while others lose the fight. What is the cure for depression? Is it pills from a pharmacy or long, endless talks with a counselor? Should they just suck it up, because life happens? I don't think we really know the answer.

I do know that depression can make a person feel alone, stuck, and exhausted. As a family member I feel this vibe, this powerful pulling energy that seems to drag you by your feet. It's a repetitive record playing a song you can't stand and you try with all of your might to shut it off. So how do we fight a beast that lives within us and wears at us? Exercise, get good sleep, eat a healthy diet always seems to be the answer. Sometimes I think depression is like a cold. You can catch it. Society pumps out all of this venom through television, magazines, and social media. And it creates this illness that some of us absorb. All the talk of how thin you should be. How educated, rich, popular, etc that "the world" says you should be.

Perhaps if you never had to be compared to another person in life you would never feel less than about yourself. Why can't we love ourselves and accept ourselves as is? Why don't we see our own value, talent, and uniqueness and feel proud just to be us? I think this is like a vaccine. If we were taught to love ourselves from the very beginning, maybe depression would never occur. It is not selfish to love yourself and to have pride in your abilities. Your appearance does not make you who you are. The amount of money in your wallet does not make who you are. Where you live, what you drive, your clothing, your religion is just a thing. Being a compassionate human who loves and nurtures their self and those around them is what we should strive for in life and thus be rewarded or reveered for. A life of goodness and kindness. Empower one another. Love on another. Be a cheerleader in your own life as well as someone you know.  If you or a loved one is suffering from depression, please reach out. If you are having thoughts about self  harm call 1-800-273-8255 or visit  https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ to chat with someone who can help. 

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